Self-pity. We’re all guilty of it from time to time. What does it accomplish? Does it help to justify the way we feel, or perhaps it validates our actions and efforts?
Andrew detected this sensation on a couple of occasions today. At first during basic training, where the student’s practice the fundamentals of Kung Fu such as kicks, punches and blocks. In his opinion he demonstrated good intent throughout, but the group was regularly lambasted and dolled out the penicillin of physical punishment – push-ups.
Later in the day, during a time dedicated to forms practice – the linking of a sequence of movements with flow and speed, Andrew felt he received less guidance and feedback than the other students.
A cocktail of self-pity and resent began to brew before Andrew recognised the learning opportunity at hand and asked himself a series of questions. For one, was he capable of giving more as in the first session? The answer was a reluctant ‘yes’. Secondly, did the second situation provide him with a chance to demonstrate independence? Once again the answer was ‘yes’. Finally, had he asked for feedback and guidance or did he expect the Shifu to read his mind (knowing the experience of the Shifu, he probably possessed this ability)? Damn, Andrew smiled. There is always more that one can do, he thought reflectively.
Andrew realised he must do away with thoughts and emotions that don’t serve him and instead direct this energy in to more constructive avenues.